Duties, Expectations, and Tips for Every Groomsman
What Do Groomsmen Actually Do? Here’s the Ultimate Guide
Being asked to be a groomsman is like getting VIP access to one of the most important events in your buddy’s life. It’s a mix of responsibility, fun, and a whole lot of camaraderie. Whether you’re a rookie groomsman or a seasoned pro, this guide is here to help you rock the role with style, enthusiasm, and a touch of swagger. Let’s dive into everything you need to know to go from “just a guy in a tux” to “wedding day MVP.”
What Is a Groomsman?
In short, you’re the groom’s go-to guy (or gal—gender doesn’t matter, the vibe does). A groomsman is more than a prop for group photos; you’re part of the groom’s inner circle, there to support him during one of the most memorable—and sometimes nerve-wracking—days of his life.
Wedding expert Lola Akingbade explains it best: “A groomsman is like the groom’s cheerleader, support system, and problem-solver rolled into one. Your role goes beyond looking good—you’re there to ensure the groom has an unforgettable experience.”
But don’t worry—it’s not all business. A huge chunk of your duties involves having fun, whether you’re throwing the bachelor party of the century or dominating the dance floor at the reception.
Pre-Wedding Duties: The Prep Work
1. Suit Up, Literally
Your first task as a groomsman? Nail your wedding-day look. Whether it’s renting a tux, buying a suit, or coordinating accessories, get your outfit sorted early. Late tux returns or mismatched socks won’t cut it. If there are fittings, show up. Both the bride and groom will be thanking you for this one.
2. Be There for the Pre-Wedding Events
Think of this as your social warm-up. Engagement party? You’re there. Bachelor party? Absolutely. Rehearsal dinner? A must. Not every groomsman can attend every event—especially if you’re traveling—but make an effort to show up for the big ones.
3. Master Bachelor Party Planning
The bachelor party is where groomsmen truly shine. Team up with the best man to throw an epic celebration that matches the groom’s personality. Whether it’s a wild weekend in Vegas or a chill camping trip with the boys, the key is making it memorable for the groom. Pro tip: Clear the plans with him beforehand to avoid surprises he might not love.
4. Book Your Travel
Destination wedding? Get your logistics sorted early. From flights to accommodations, it’s all on you. Many couples arrange room blocks with discounted rates, so take advantage of those deals. If it’s a local wedding but the groom wants the squad at the same hotel, plan accordingly.
5. Gift-Giving Like a Pro
Check out the coupe’s registry and team up with the other groomsmen for a big-ticket item. It’s a thoughtful way to show your appreciation without breaking the bank. Remember, the best gifts are the ones that are useful and still come straight from the heart.
Wedding Week: Showtime
1. Help the Groom Stay Cool
Your main mission? Keep the groom calm and steady. From pep talks to last-minute coffee runs, your presence should be reassuring. If there’s ever a moment when he seems overwhelmed, step in with some humor or advice.
2. Execute Last-Minute Tasks
Sometimes, things don’t go as planned. Maybe an uncle missed his flight, or a decoration isn’t where it should be. As a groomsman, be ready to troubleshoot without making it a big deal.
3. Get Ready for the Big Day
On the wedding morning, arrive early, fully dressed (or ready to dress), and prepared to help with anything. Need to fetch forgotten cufflinks? Coordinate with vendors? Handle last-minute details? You’re the guy for the job.
Wedding Day Duties: The Main Event
1. The Ceremony
Show up 30–45 minutes early. You might be asked to usher guests or escort bridesmaids down the aisle. Either way, your job is to keep the energy positive and the proceedings smooth.
2. Bring the Positivity
The groom’s suite is where excitement and nerves collide. Bring good vibes, jokes, and maybe even snacks. Wedding expert Lola Akingbade puts it best: “The groomsmen are there to keep the mood light and the groom happy. Positive energy is contagious.”
3. Smile for the Camera
Group photos are a wedding staple, and as a groomsman, you’ll be in plenty of them. Bring your A-game for both serious shots and goofy candids. Trust us, the couple will treasure these memories—and you’ll enjoy looking back on them, too.
Party Time: The Reception
1. Be a Social Butterfly
While the bride and groom are busy making rounds, you might field guest questions or help direct people. “Where’s the restroom?” or “When’s the cake cutting?” might come your way.
2. Dance Like Everyone’s Watching
You’ll likely be paired with a bridesmaid for the wedding party entrance—so make it count! Whether it’s a smooth spin or a full-on moonwalk, start the reception with energy.
3. Support Where Needed
From helping carry gifts to moving decorations, don’t shy away from lending a hand. You’d be surprised how far a simple act of kindness can really go.
Post-Wedding Duties: Wrapping It All Up
1. Stick Around to Help
Once the couple leaves for their honeymoon, there might still be work to do—like packing up decorations or helping family members load their cars.
2. Return the Gear
Got a rental tux? Return it on time. Late fees are no fun, and the groom doesn’t need the added hassle.
3. Relax and Celebrate
You’ve done your part. Time to kick back, enjoy the memories, and wait for the wedding photos to drop.
Groomsmen Frequently Asked Questions
Do Groomsmen Walk Down the Aisle?
In many weddings, yes! You might walk solo, escort a bridesmaid, or even join the groom as he enters. The couple will let you know the plan. If you’re paired with a bridesmaid, take the lead by offering your arm and matching her pace—it’s a simple touch that looks classy in photos. Don’t forget to smile and enjoy the moment; you’re setting the tone for an incredible day!
Are Groomsmen Expected to Give Speeches?
It’s usually the best man’s territory, but some weddings may call for groomsmen speeches—especially at the rehearsal dinner. Be prepared just in case. If you’re asked to speak, keep it short, sweet, and personal—no need to steal the show! Practice ahead of time, and steer clear of any embarrassing stories that could make the groom squirm.
Can Married Guys Be Groomsmen?
Of course! Your relationship status doesn’t affect your ability to support your friend. In fact, married groomsmen often bring an extra layer of wisdom and calmness to the crew. Bonus: If your spouse is attending the wedding, it’s a great chance to include them in the celebration and make it even more memorable.
How Do You Split Bachelor Party Costs?
Each groomsman typically pays their own way and pitches in to cover the groom’s expenses. Apps like Splitwise or Venmo make dividing costs a breeze. Don’t forget to budget for extras like transportation, meals, and any group activities—it’s better to plan ahead than to scramble on the spot. The goal is to make the groom feel celebrated without putting unnecessary financial stress on anyone.
What Should I Bring on Wedding Day?
Pack essentials like mints, a lint roller, deodorant, and maybe an extra pair of socks. Bonus: Carrying a phone charger makes you everyone’s hero. Throw in some band-aids or a stain-remover pen—they could save the day if there’s a minor wardrobe malfunction. Also, consider having an energy bar or snacks handy; a long day of celebrations can leave you needing a quick pick-me-up.
Final Thoughts
Being a groomsman is a badge of honor. It’s a chance to be part of your friend’s big day while creating memories that’ll last a lifetime. Sure, there’s some work involved, but with the right mindset, it’s all part of the fun.
Now that you know what it takes to be an all-star groomsman, it’s time to step up, suit up, and make it a wedding to remember. After all, a great groomsman isn’t just there for the groom; you’re also part of the magic that makes the wedding day unforgettable for everyone. Let’s do this!